Friday, January 24, 2020

Blogging for My Children

The main thing that I hope for my children is that they have a hunger for Truth that can only be given to them by the Holy Spirit. The only thing I can do is demonstrate this fire in my heart to seek Truth and encourage them in this endeavor.

I've been writing journals in one form or another since I started high school. It probably took off when I started puberty (I was a little late), and couldn't sleep with all the hormones flowing through my body.

My brain is filled with a bunch of thoughts, and I find it helpful to write them out to get it out of my system. I normally never read my past journal entries.

I blogged during my 12 years of marriage. I'm glad I did, because it was very insightful to review them when I was divorced.

I combed through all my notes and data that I had collected to figure out, "what happened?"

It brought great clarity and brought me closure in a way I could never receive otherwise. It's like if you were to talk to a Gamma. You could never trust what they say because they are trapped in their own emotional space and believe their own lies, so you just have to figure it out based on the notes and observations you had gathered over the years.

Blogging took on a new importance once I was alienated from my children. It became a way for me to document the processes of my thinking. I hope that one day, they will read my blog, and be able to understand me more.

They have already heard numerous lies, and one of my objectives is to confront the lies told about me (and to me) directly. I want to confront the lies that will inevitably be taught to the children. I want to confront the lies told by their pastors, Churchians, and those whom they are told to trust.

This world is filled with lies. I feel the need to expose those lies, analyze them, and destroy them with Truth.

My children will then be free to choose whether to live in the lies or in the Truth.

I pray that they have discernment, because pretty much every single position can be justified by some sort of authority figure.

I leave my thought process exposed so that my children can use my questions and thoughts as a starting point for their own further investigation.

Maybe it will be helpful to you too.

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